Insomniac

Here I am, 2:29 am with unsuccessfully trying to fall asleep again after my mom scared the hell out of me with a random call at around midnight. I’ve tried everything… well, everything in my power right now. I don’t have sleeping pills, and right now, I don’t know if that’s a good thing or hmmmm… I hear they can be quite addictive. So I stay away from them. It happens every now and then. It takes so long to get to that magic state of sleep and dreams. But somehow it's interrupted, like today and yesterday. So after crawling in bed and losing that fight with my mind I decided to get up, put on my dressing gown, pee and start writing. Yesterday I wrote, but from bed and in my little journal, if there is something I am grateful for, it is for having my little red light next to my bed. It's my saviour in little moments like these. It's perfect for me to write and read but not powerful enough to light up the whole room. Anyway, that was yesterday and it's gone. Today is different and I got up and started a new post. But the general idea is: that on both days I started writing. My inspirations come in paper….(or screen?!?) Some people say this little “insomniac” might be stressed, could be. Who knows. I have many things in my mind and everything that happens to me I see it as a story. But sometimes I lose that story in my own head and when the time to write comes I write everything else but that story. Does that mean something? Or anything? Anyway, I am here just writing away cause… I enjoy it really. And my head is like that Black Eyed Peas song: going “Boom Boom Boom.” Any ideas how to calm it down? I’m running out of them already. Man, it's almost three and I am still here, yawning at least.

I’m gonna go now and try reading with my little red light and see if Morpheus finally comes to me for a little while.

All I am asking is to be able to be with the God of Dreams for a few hours every night; for a few hours more, I should clarify.